Sometimes, healing takes you to unusual places — Do you want to know a secret? I haven’t had a sexual fantasy about a man in at least eight months. …

Men might have more privilege, but they aren’t free in the bedroom — Like many women, my sexual experiences were awful for the entire decade of my twenties. If I had an orgasm, it was because I made it happen — not because I had a thoughtful lover who cared about my pleasure. And the only way I could make that happen was…

Rape is so much more than what we’ve been taught — CW: rape/sexual trauma Rape. It’s one of the scariest words I know. Maybe the scariest. There’s something about its very sound that is dissonant and ugly. Its aggressively monosyllabic presence. Its long vowel ending with a hard consonant. It makes me go cold inside. I came to know this word…

What will it take to wake us up? — “Hey!” I yelled. “Watch out!” I don’t usually have such outbursts, but imminent danger inspires such things. …

And why I can’t do it anymore, even though I wanted to be a mom — I’ve been having the strangest feelings over the past few months. I long to get a new dog or perhaps a rabbit — something fuzzy and warm who will cuddle with me. I miss that. I miss my dog who was by my side for 12 years. I miss his…

Sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands — “Come with me,” my boyfriend said, suddenly grabbing my hand. “I want you to see something.” I was confused for a moment as he pulled me through the door of a fancy jewelry shop in the middle of our downtown stroll. What on earth was on his mind? Suddenly, everything…

Apparently, the dating scene of middle age is no different than college — I had so much patience in college. Honestly, I look back and am so proud of myself for the level of patience and fortitude I had. One boyfriend dumped me because, as it turned out, he was using me to cheat on his girlfriend in order to hurt her after…

And no, that doesn’t mean we’re supporting misogynists — Look, can we just talk about this small dick stuff? I get it. It can come off as criticism against people who don’t deserve to be criticized. It’s easy to interpret it as nitpicking the oppressed. Some might even claim this invitation for analysis is yet another form of misogyny. …

When starting all over again obliterates everything you had — “I don’t know what to do. How do you start over when you’re almost seventy?” It’s the day after Christmas and I’m texting with my father’s cousin, Ellen, one of my favorite relatives. …